Batista & Kali ...Ew

Yesterday was a complete bore. I tried fiddling with the computer a bit, but my job requires me to fiddle with them damn things for 8 hours per day. So I thought what the hell, its Sunday after all - and turned my attention to tv. Unfortunately brother dear had already seized the throne ; aka in possession of the remote. :( I had no choice but to sit and watch what his highness was watching...And we watched *drumroll*.....
Batista Vs Kali on something called No Mercy. (?)
First there was this huge yucky guy named Kali ( supposedly after the Hindu goddess - but why is a GUY named Kali?? Isnt Kali supposed to be FEMALE? huh ??)
and he was inside a bamboo cage. He was strutting about for a bit and then another guy named Batista showed up. Batista was also yucky but less so because he was less huge and therefore appeared to be at least human and not a long lost brother of Hagrid. Anywayz he was also put in the bamboo cage - um two cages actually. It was a cage inside a cage. So the deal was that these two guys had to hit each other a lot and somehow escape the bamboo cages. The first one out wins. There was some deal about doors in the cages but I didnt really get it since I was too busy forming a conspiracy to regain the lost remote ( I am the rightful heir since I am the eldest. Thats how it works in fairy tales init? ) and also I was too engrossed in the yuckyness of the aforementioned guys in general to notice anything about the commentary - So sue me.
So anyway the fight began and Kali started bashing poor Batista like hell. I actually felt sorry for him despite his Ewness. According to the idiot doing the commentary, "Kali had been meditating, praying to his evil hindu gods and it seems to be working" Yeah right. EVIL hindu gods??
So after these two hit each other a lot Kali started to climb the cage. He was halfway there when Batista woke up ( he was lying on the ground seemingly blacked out ) and started to race Kali. When he got to the other side of the first cage Kali was already on the outer cage. Why didnt he (Kali) just jump? What an idiot! Anyway this is just what Batista did. Hmm maybe he does have some brain cells after all. So the end result is that poor Batista won even though that idiot Kali could have won.
What the hell is it that makes this so interesting anyway? There were all these people in the audience screaming and jumping up and down and just going crazy. I mean how can anyone find bashing a fellow human being entertaining?? I just dont get it...Melo rahak na.
After listening to my ranting about how gross and uncivilized and violent it is, brother dear patiently explained to me that all pro wrestling matches are fixed so they're fake. Huh? So if they're fake whats the point anyway??
Someone puhleeeze explain this to me....